How To Be Alone Without Feeling Lonely

29. okt.. 2018
268 900 Ganger

Four Emotions for an Amazing First Impression:
How To Be More Self Aware:
Subscribe to Charisma On Command’s NOworld Account:

I know we talk a lot about social dynamics, how to make great first impressions and creating fun conversations--but I don’t want you to feel like being alone is a bad thing.
It might be tough seeing your friends going out every weekend with their significant other while you hang out in your room on a friday night--but that’s life and there will be days and nights like that (and it's totally normal and okay).
So how do we be in solitude and not feel lonely?
00:28 - Point #1: You Don’t Need People To Deal With Loneliness
01:33 - Point #2: The Prediction Spreadsheet
03:32 - Point #3: Doing Things That Don’t Make You Happy
05:00 - Point #4: Build Habits Of Fun Activities
06:03 - Point #5: Do Something Special
#SelfHelp #CharismaOnCommand #FeelLessLonely
Connect With Us Further:
Instagram: @CharismaOnCommand
Or if you want to see our personal stuff (regular life + playing music):
Instagram: @CharlieHoupert
Instagram: @IamBenAltman

  • I love to be alone but I don't feel lonely ,I do my own thing's no one can judge me ,

    arjun hellarjun hell10 timer siden
  • the covid-19 pandemic caused me to have much less contact with my girlfriend apart from online contact (which was still very limited because she was having trouble with school) and this really helped me, thank you very much

    Dio BrandoDio Brando4 dager siden
  • make a video about uow to manifest a boyfriend that looks like u

    non binaryhoenon binaryhoe18 dager siden
  • You are a genius man

    Brooks BensonBrooks Benson25 dager siden
  • Reminder: Most of us aren't perfect. What we have, may be anothers desire. but when what you have has higher to lower levels of quality measurements(almost everyone)--curiousity proceeds(in the open), and attention becomes valued as promises that we wished were kept, that pattern consumes us. We are sweet and sour, intoxicating and toxic. I refuse debt, I'm in college, and I work everyday. That control that I have, is credible enough to imply that I know myself therefore I can trust myself. Being alone is great when you don't do or have the same interests as others. I am wrong, and I am an example for you. But in my ”devolving” perspective,-- I'd rather be unhappy for a safe cause then be happy with the high risks of collapse. F*ck your journey’s

    Cry baby AzzCry baby Azz26 dager siden
  • I know I have friends and family who I love and who love me, but I still feel so depressed and lonely and I don’t know why

    Jiminie MouseJiminie MouseMåned siden
  • being alone is seriously great!!! awesome video😊 i made a video on how to be happy alone too ^__^

    Ameleeia VlogsAmeleeia VlogsMåned siden
  • I been lonely for couple of years nothing will cheer me up I always feel depressed and just want to be alone and get angry when some one come sit with me

    now we're talkinnow we're talkinMåned siden
  • Fantastic video. Needed this, thank you so much!

    Anthony LairdAnthony LairdMåned siden
  • Idk if this will work for anybody else but from some reason if I just have a fire near by I feel a lot less lonely. a campfire or a candle help for some reason.

    Joel FergusonJoel Ferguson2 måneder siden
  • this was actually super useful!

    Gareth ThomasGareth Thomas2 måneder siden
  • News feed eradicator just saved my life. Thank you a million times!😁

    Crystal BentleyCrystal Bentley3 måneder siden
  • I feel lonely when I have no new ideas. They say to find peace you need to think of basically nothing. Well, thinking of nothing doesn't feel very good. Maybe. Maybe it isn't non thinking.

    Carryn WeldeCarryn Welde3 måneder siden
  • This video just made me realize how okay I already am and have been for a while of being alone. I only really feel fomo on a weekend night when everyone is "supposed" to be out and I'm not, but I've also really just enjoyed being by my own, doing the things I love at home even on a Friday night. And I've always loved being around friends and doing social activities, there are just also so many other things I love doing that often involve me just being alone. I think the observation of the opposite of loneliness being a connection to an idea or a thing is such a great one.

    iamdalethesnailiamdalethesnail4 måneder siden
  • thank you so much wow

    MirteMirte4 måneder siden
  • well it doent work :( hope i can find an answer

    Ocean MANOcean MAN4 måneder siden
  • Feels like this is definitely the right advice thank you!

    Aurelio NicolettiAurelio Nicoletti4 måneder siden
  • Being on my own during this pandemic for such a long time has really done some negative effects on me.

    Anna TurnerAnna Turner5 måneder siden
  • People around you will NEVER understand you. Only you understand you. Therefore know yourself well in order to cope with loneliness.

    Don TranDon Tran6 måneder siden
  • I think you'r an introvert and you don't know because extroverts don't enjoy being alone .. I believe loneliness comes from missing specific person that you love and understands you and can connect with you because for me personally I somtimes feel lonely even if I am enjoying my time alone

    Ahmed HazemAhmed Hazem6 måneder siden
  • HA I'm always lonely nobody cares about me (:

    EyeAmTheSolesbeeEyeAmTheSolesbee6 måneder siden
  • Thanks a lot for the information.

    Mahedi Hassan ShawonMahedi Hassan Shawon6 måneder siden
  • I hate being alone 😭

    FreddieFreddie6 måneder siden
  • how is he able to talk like that, i would never be able to talk infront of a camera or anything wooh

    Heiwana otokoHeiwana otoko6 måneder siden
  • why do we compare ourselves? i think because of natural selection. being attractive means healthy dna means good offspring. big boobs broad hips big muscles and being taller means strong healthy offspring, good baby makers, good baby nurturers etc. it all has a reason. now to say that you should not compare yourself to others is to deny the existence natural selection. it’s stubborn. although i could see why comparison makes people upset. i think it is better too realize that if you want to be a good, strong, healthy, attractive human you should feel upset to admit that natural selection exist and then try to do everything that could make you a more attractive and healthy human. but just ignoring the fact that sexy people get more tail for example is not going to get you more tail for example. admit that you are not want you want and work on it rather than settling for less and denying or ignoring that improvement is possible.

    S. de BruijnS. de Bruijn6 måneder siden
  • What if you're alone all the time?

    Quarantined Insomniac WeebQuarantined Insomniac Weeb6 måneder siden
  • i subscribed man' great content made my day

    Kiran SharmaKiran Sharma7 måneder siden
  • thank you

    lucy liulucy liu7 måneder siden
  • I’m trying to work on being alone but still being happy because today I noticed every single one of my friends were toxic and jealous of me so I’m experiencing no friends for the first time in my life and I think about them every minute. That’s why I want to be alone more but I can’t without being sad and depressed and feeling like your nothing without your friends.

    Sad CloudSad Cloud7 måneder siden
    • I can relate more than you know. You might enjoy some things I've been putting up recently on that subject. Just a silly old man dealing with it. Take care, we got each other out here.

      The Black Sheep DiariesThe Black Sheep Diaries7 måneder siden
  • Pretty helpful

    Que SowersQue Sowers7 måneder siden
  • I have NO fam what so ever due to terrible early circumstances, I also never made a circle of friends when i was younger so cant socialize with friends. Nor do I have one single friend. My phones contact page is empty apart from Dr/dentist/vet/pizza/utilities. Im in my early 40s now. I wonder who else is like this/can relate? How do we cope with the reality we have no one? it isnt easy living. I want to embrace this lonely life I have, not by choice but through default alone. I didnt chose this, it happened to me.

    Miss FurmitMiss Furmit7 måneder siden
    • I have a place where you are welcome, and it just might help, that's my goal anyway. Stay strong, we are all in this big ole mess together.

      The Black Sheep DiariesThe Black Sheep Diaries7 måneder siden
  • Thanks Mate!

    Hirusha DeshanHirusha Deshan8 måneder siden
  • thank you 👍👍

    Abdou AbdouAbdou Abdou8 måneder siden
  • I'm lonely because I have to stay at home all day alone. Since I'm jobless, also I and my bf have to move to another city where I have no friends and family at all here. And my bf got home late at night everyday from his work. Gosh I'm so bored and lonely! I miss my hometown. And I can't get a job too because I don't have high degree, also I've been dealing with anxiety and panic disorder for more than 3 years. I feel powerless. 😭

    rayna tharayna tha8 måneder siden
  • 7:19 These are great tips, Charlie Houpert! A lot of people misjudge me for being lonely just because I am an introvert PWD. Yep, being PWD can be lonely as my movement is limited. I mean, I have to ability to run nor climb a tree. But you know what, I am not lonely as what others are expecting. I am an introvert, I am loving my alone time and I am loving my day-to-day lifestyle. It is simple, I do not need a lot of friends. I just need to improve the inner connection within myself by dong the hobbies that make me happy being alone.

    Dean Ryan MartinDean Ryan Martin8 måneder siden
  • Omg thank you 🙌🏽I need this💕

    Cassandra LedezmaCassandra Ledezma9 måneder siden
  • What if you scroll through instagram for the memes

    Harshal ThachapullyHarshal Thachapully9 måneder siden
  • Thanks it helps 😊😊

    Nechard RoblesNechard Robles9 måneder siden
  • I’m not telling anyone why i am lonely

    Vanessa ZamoranoVanessa Zamorano9 måneder siden
  • Feeling alone? Just create a NOworld channel and post funny videos that you'll enjoy yourself like etc you want to go to an amusement park but with no friends just take your phone or camera and keep busy recording yourself and the place. Or maybe alone at home just make a funny video or skit that may make people's day 😊

    Noora SaifNoora Saif9 måneder siden
  • Amazing video man. Great advice.

    All of The GamesAll of The Games9 måneder siden
  • Well, this didnt help. Thanks for nothing, guy.

    oblivious108oblivious1089 måneder siden
  • This video is really amazing

    Swift ShengSwift Sheng10 måneder siden
  • Thanks for this video. It will help me a lot. I have changed workschedules for the first time in 15 years, and now I feel a little bit worried. Your advice will help, a lot :)

    Melissa RainchildMelissa Rainchild10 måneder siden
  • I just want to meet new people and make friends but I don’t know how. Since I recently graduated from high school i have no idea what to be doing. Maybe I should join the military.

    idris idrisidris idris10 måneder siden
  • I just got out of a two and a half year relationship, any advice on how to stop missing them all the time?

    Lucy BeamishLucy Beamish10 måneder siden
  • Im dont have fomo, i have been puked out by all my classmates for the past 9 years. Thats why i feel lonely 😉. And if i ever had a friend they would use me and dump me , so thats great.

    Julia CalisJulia Calis10 måneder siden
  • I keep returning to this video because it is so on target. Absolutely the best advice. Thank you!

    Gary KuhlmannGary Kuhlmann11 måneder siden
  • I can't remember the last time someone called me just to say hello, but when i do them never call me back. they are too busy.

    Big daddy sugar caneBig daddy sugar cane11 måneder siden
  • I've always thought if you can't be happy alone then how can you be happy with someone else. I guess I better clean the house then LOL

    Zac BZac B11 måneder siden
  • 🦋it is so important to know that you are never alone. When you hold to your faith you know God loves & cares about you. You ARE a child of God & loves you more then you know

    Lara SmithLara Smith11 måneder siden
  • Best advice ever😄

    widmie milordwidmie milord11 måneder siden
  • I love placing connection to something you love rather than " someone" you love.

    Scott AdamsScott AdamsÅr siden
  • thank u for this video i have been feeling so lonely so unwanted i just need me to be me with me

    bean sbean sÅr siden
  • Thank you. Nice smile.

    Rosana RodriguezRosana RodriguezÅr siden
  • “Feeling alone cause all your friends have significant others and you don’t” that hit me hard 😩

    heyyitsfongheyyitsfongÅr siden
    • @johnny joestar's biscuit honest ly, it's great to hear that! Enjoying your time, making friend. I'm twice your age. Never a wish better tham being at your age. Plenty of choices, both great and not so great one, so earn them. I myself regret chasing friends most of the time in my youth. Once I thought friends is everything. Now I work a lot, travel a lot, taking care of my parents, alone. More than just fine: if you cant have both sucess and friendship, then between (a) having nothing and having no friend to come to for help, and (b) having something, a job, a career, a meaningful life, a car, a house, money in thr bank, and having no friend. Choose B. Youre still to young for all that, and I dont mean to show you the sad side of life. I still have friends, and I treat them good, but I make it clear to myslf that they aint everything, that if they dont deserve that, then i rather not having them in my life anymore. I have my luve to live, my job to do, and a working team to lead, the recent Corona disease make many people in my company jobless. My parents are old now, at least my responsible is support them the best I could. Friendship is good, some last for life, but there're still your dream, responsible.

      Dang QuangDang Quang2 dager siden
    • @Dang Quang I posted that a while ago but I have actually accepted this and decided to enjoy what I have so far. By the way, I am only 14.

      johnny joestar's biscuitjohnny joestar's biscuit2 dager siden
    • @johnny joestar's biscuit dude, how old are you? Many people here have the feeling of being alone since primary school to secondary, then high school, and then university, then the working life that many found it much more hard to be socialized, because offices aint for making friend (I learnt that the hard way). If youre still in school or something, my advice is: if youre not the kind of socialized guy, if people seem to forget your existence, if you feel like you have to chase people. Well stop chasing people, start to enjoy being alone, growing your mental health, your skills, your talent, build a lovely home, being wealthy emotionally and materialisticly. Otherwise, unless youre filthy rich, no one will care about you, they will remember you when you need something from you. In real life, no one care of you felling lonely, stop complainning and start doing something about that. After year of chasing freind, I finaly stop and take care of myself, having my own business, start building my own sweet home. I can take care of almost everythings on my own. Only people like not-close friends and not-so-close relatives that need my help, if anyone of them dont like me, thats their problem, without them, I'm fine. Life aint great, but not so bad. In a recent wedding, my nephew asked me for help (money, obviously), I helpeped, after that, he invited me over for their family warming up dinner. As busy as I am, I drove for 50 miles to came over, when I got the, he screamed at me, he expected me to come early, they needed people to help prearing the dinner. Omg, the heck? I told him: I think I gonna need the money that you took from me earlier. Then I walked out, went to a local restaurant and ordered a complete meal course. His family still calling me everyday to solve the matter. As I said: it's their problem, I am fed up with such kind of nonsense.

      Dang QuangDang Quang2 dager siden
    • well congrats u r in next lvl what about you r alone with no friends far from home :(

      Ocean MANOcean MAN4 måneder siden
    • 90% of the people in this comment section don't even have friends

      يوسف الوزانيوسف الوزان6 måneder siden
  • I love being alone, but lately I’ve been feeling lonely. I literally haven’t felt lonely in my 18 years of life. And I’ve always been an introvert, and have problems with socializing. So I found being alone a comfortable thing. But not anymore. Lately I’ve been wanting friends. And I never felt that way before. What is wrong with me?

    Al. S.Al. S.År siden
    • Do you want to talk?I could give you my instagram

      boom bubblyboom bubbly8 måneder siden
  • What if social media is the only contact with people I have.

    Jay JJay JÅr siden
  • I’ve had two weeks off and have felt out of place but booked myself an hour wakeboarding on my own

    Tim BTim BÅr siden
  • I really want a pet so I can satisfy myself alone, but unfortunately our condominium doesn’t allow pets.

    Francisco IsidroFrancisco IsidroÅr siden
  • So I have no friends but I don't care!!! Because I lived entirely with this from childhood.... You would say that I m not a good person so that's why I don't have any friends but NO I never find someone who really want to be with me.... May be because I am I am not like them.

  • Hey Charlie, do you follow Teal Swan? I can recognize her teaching in your videos and it's really interesting to see it this way

    Toki The KiwiToki The KiwiÅr siden
  • Thank you💣💎

    Narges BahadoriNarges BahadoriÅr siden
  • It's good to be alone to a certain point in our lives. We need to get out of our comfort zones when we go out in public and try to be more open to people. We need connections with someone we would have in common with so we won't be alone. Wearing headphones in public would make you antisocial, so take them off and be more open to someone who wants to make a connection with you.

    Mr. GoGetter18Mr. GoGetter18År siden
  • Bart Simpson sad edits is the way.

    Nicholas NelsonNicholas NelsonÅr siden
  • *Cough**Cough* No fomo bro

    Ice bearIce bearÅr siden
  • I am usually against the fact that we have to watch youtube videos on how to live our lives. I hate that. But your videos are really something else. On to my main point. I turned 25 less than a month ago. The last two years have been... Really hard. Got out of a three-year relationship, spent the last two years single, no flings, many unsuccessful dates. I have two more exams to pass to finish college, and yet I should have done so exactly two years ago. I play bass in one band, and while we sound great, I really can't connect with my bandmates in a private sense since they're kinda bumish. The only good thing that's come out of all of this is that I have been working with my dad over the summers (we play gigs once or twice a week, not very well paid but it's at least something). However, the worst things about this period are, one, I've lost interest in pretty much all of my hobbies (gaming, reading, model-building, movies, shows, learning tango), and two, all my friends and social circles have just... Vanished. Dispersed. Everybody started working 9 to 5 jobs, meeting other people, doing other things, and I am just - stuck. I'm stuck sitting at home alone, since I have no friends, doing absolutely nothing the whole day, because I lost interest in everything. So I figure, I need new environments, new social activities where I could meet new people, maybe find a new relationship, start doing fun new stuff. The problem is - I've got absolutely no idea where to go and what to do. Zero. I am aware that my main focus now should be on graduating from college, that would allow me to get a proper job and doing so meet new people and move on in life, yet I can't focus on studying because my current situation weighs heavy on my mind and disrupts me in any attempt to study. If anyone has any advice for me, please, I'm open to suggestions. My life is wasting, time is just passing me by and I just want out of this metaphorical ditch.

    Jovan RolandJovan RolandÅr siden
  • I love being alone

    MMÅr siden
    • a certain point when you don't want to do certain things alone.

      Mr. GoGetter18Mr. GoGetter18År siden
  • I feel fine when I'm on my own, but when I'm along among strangers, that's horrible.

    Zoe NelsonZoe NelsonÅr siden
  • The social media thing is totally true... scrolling through my insta feed ruins my morning yet I feel obligated to do it. Maybe I'll give it a rest for a bit.

    Zoe NelsonZoe NelsonÅr siden
  • broke up with gf, no friends feel lonely as fuk

    Ryan KochRyan KochÅr siden
  • I’ve lost friends who I thought were friends. That whole saying “you have to love yourself before you love others”. That’s utter bs. It’s compensating for lack of others. We should all love each other. There’s those who lack that. We become alone when all fails. There’s no rebound like in relationships were you have a rebound. When alone, you may have family or friends. If you lack either of the two you may be stronger one way. But that’s not the case. You may feel lonely around family and the same goes to friends. You can act on it and try to make a difference but if either family or friends are bad then you’re back to square one.

    Izzy BIzzy BÅr siden
  • I feel like Im good at being alone, but then I hang out with old friends and I just miss that. I think its also because I feel validated like my thinking and philosophical ideas are appreciated. I know self appreciation comes first i just have to learn that I really sound egocentric now but i like to e around people is what Im trying to say XD

    crazyanimeloveablecrazyanimeloveableÅr siden
  • I'm in a weird place in my life where my girlfriend broke up with me despite me wanting to break up with her, and now I'm missing that intimacy and also missing her at the same time. I know if we got back together it wouldn't work but there's a part of me that still wants to out of fear of loneliness. Because of this I can't stop thinking about her which is distracting me from wanting to be at peace when being alone. Any tips?

    Jöl MaisJöl MaisÅr siden
    • How u coping now. Any better?

      Myrah BegMyrah Beg11 måneder siden
  • im an ambivert

    AoyamaAoyamaÅr siden
  • adventures alone are superior to adventures with others.

    Mr.Potato HeadMr.Potato HeadÅr siden
    • Why do you think so?

      Yana DreYana DreÅr siden
  • - Don't use Social Media! - Later in the video: follow me on Instagram! : )

    Dina BaidildayevaDina BaidildayevaÅr siden
  • Just, THANK YOU!

  • I don’t know if you’ll read this, but thank you so much for this video. I’ve been feeling lonely and with anxiety lately so I was going out of my mind not knowing what to do because now I think I would depend on social media and people for distractions and whenever I didn’t have that I would feel lonely. I know, and I’m trying to validate my own existence. Your video helped me think of ways to cope with feeling lonely. I typed my own list to see if that’ll help from now on. Thank you for this video. You’re amazing‼️❤️

    karuhnakaruhnaÅr siden
  • Yeah but no one like me...

    poop pooppoop poopÅr siden
  • I wanna play guitar to feel less lonely in the night. But I live in an apartment

    Terry ZúñigaTerry ZúñigaÅr siden
  • Sempre gostei de aproveitar meus momentos sozinha, mas como vc disse as vezes ficamos receosos de fazer algo que queremos pq parece estranho ir ao cinema sozinho ou algo do tipo, mas isso são besteiras que a sociedade nos impõe. Saber apreciar a própria companhia é algo libertador, eu não abro mão dos meus momentos de "solidão"

    Siria SouzaSiria SouzaÅr siden
  • People like me and stay with me but I want to go alone

    RetroMineRetroMineÅr siden
  • I'm lonely 24 ,365

    Symes AlexanderSymes AlexanderÅr siden
  • Just smile all the time.

    LeoPelozoLeoPelozoÅr siden
  • Dont count on other people. But be accountable.

    Joe JonesJoe JonesÅr siden
  • Social media causes depression

    Joe JonesJoe JonesÅr siden
  • Like the man said: Loneliness has nothing to do with being alone. Introverts don't need the presence of other people in order to feel good. For us, an evening alone or with a friend is the payoff for an exhausting day of socializing. This is where we're strong. Being introverted is _ awesome _. @charisma on command, I really appreciate what you're doing here. It's sort of like school for unusual personality types. It's good. Thanks.

    S. JayeS. JayeÅr siden
  • I feel so lonely right now. That I am motivated to go to work even so, I hate it.

    The JokerThe JokerÅr siden
  • Who else feels like it’s easier to interact with people in the comment section you’ve never met than people in your class you’ve gone to class with for years

    {StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvP{StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvPÅr siden
  • Sometimes I feel like loneliness is the only thing I can show affection and relate to

    {StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvP{StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvPÅr siden
  • Us lonely people let’s unite and not be lonely! Let’s start a conversation under this commebt

    {StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvP{StrYKePlaysMC / johnpick} Hypixel PvPÅr siden
  • I have depression so that covers everything.

    Franky AlvarezFranky AlvarezÅr siden
  • I'm kinda distracted by his facial hair coz he kinda looks like Flynn Ryder with it

    Jemma CJemma CÅr siden
  • I'm an ambivert, so I can enjoy my own company...but I'm single and usually alone, don't go I get pretty lonely.

    Tsepiso MTsepiso MÅr siden
  • I wish I was alone

    Eugenio BeniventoEugenio BeniventoÅr siden
  • You know just watching how u express and teach how things should work is very helpful, glad to find such treasure

    vangievangieÅr siden
  • Being alone and being lonely are two very different things.

    Winston ChurchillWinston ChurchillÅr siden
  • I always feel lonely at school I feel like everybody is a bully or not the kindest they could be. 😃😃 Now when I'm alone and lonely I just play with myself it's pretty boring but I'll always get used to it.

    CoolGamer ZachCoolGamer ZachÅr siden
  • How to be alone withou feeling lonely? Go the restaurant, be there alone, and watch other groups having fun :D

    enjay86enjay86År siden